1976 called, and she wants her phone back

While I was picking up Aaron's birthday present (which is the single most progressive toy I have ever seen in my entire life and how could a modern-day mom like Susan not have this for her son, who will grow up to be sensitive yet manly thanks to his mom and dad's guidance and things like this and even if he doesn't use it for it's intended purpose it makes good flying saucers or chewing gum dishes. I'll tell you all about later just in case she gets a break from hiding all the stuff on the floors in her closets in a rampant attempt to ready the house for the party and happens upon this blog) I spotted one of my favorite childhood toys and knew that Jake had to have it for his eight month day.

As I bought it I thought "Jake loves my phone. He will love this one too". I shelled out the $15 for it, rushed it home, took it out of its retro packaging, and then realized that Jake will have no idea what the heck this thing is. He'll never dial a rotary phone, never have to worry about getting yelled at because the cord got all kinked and tangled because he was nervous and playing with it while he was on the phone with a girl, or make me worry about him pulling the phone off the table and on to his head. He'll never have a little book with his friend's telephone numbers listed in it, or need to learn my extension at work (3433 was my dad's, and I could ask for mom by name). But, he'll have this. And that freaky cookie monster head. You can imagine how I felt about that thing when I pulled it out of the gift bag. I almost puked.