this is not a high coup

My company is changing its name.
The initials will remain the same.
The mission will remain the same.
The address will remain the same.
My salary will remain the same.

I don't like it.
I say we keep Philadelphia in the title.
No one asked me about this.
Don't they know I have problems with the word "public"?
Toilets and telephones are public.
At least the ones I prefer to use.

I hear they are changing the logo.
I hope this means I get a new mug.
My corporate logo mug is from 2002.
It has never been properly washed.
We don't have hot water on my floor.

I rinse my dirty deskfork in my coffee.
And wipe it with kleenex that I steal from a co-worker's desk.
Sometimes I loan out my deskfork.
Enjoy your ramen noodles, suckers.

I rarely drink office coffee.
It just sits there to prove I've been in lately.

I have decided I will not use the word "Public".
I will be referring to my place of business as the Pubic Xxxxxh Xxxxxxxxxt Xxxxxxxxxxn.
It's funnier.