day two

Last Saturday morning we woke up in an amazing businessman's hotel right off the QEW, about fifteen minutes down the street from the cutest town in the world.

Niagara-on-the-Lake, Ontario (click for pics) is one of those quaint little places that make you want to wear itchy lace collars and white kid gloves and gladly pay some velvet-clad fancy-pantsed sheister for some sort of urine-colored tonic in a glass bottle with a cork stopper that kills bugs while restoring lost hair and virginity.

We didn't, but we did get a little dressed up and stopped at the Charles Inn for an amazing breakfast, a gentleman's game of monkey bar challenge (I won. Long arms and the power of feminine sway help), and a stop at the Cherry Festival before embarking on a 35 km bike tour of the Niagara wine country.

We stopped and tasted and tasted and tasted at Jackson-Triggs, Peller Estates, Lailey, Reif, and Marynissen- where we ran into a girl I used to be total work bff's with back in the olden days when we were working the streets and sizing up crackheads and crazies in the peejays of West Philly (holler) and writing up wildly official reports to send to the State so important decisions could be made regarding the future of the aforementioned. Yeah. So. Um. We were livin' loca back then and were more interested in life from 5-9 than we were from 9-5. Maybe we should have taken things a bit more seriously. But really, I can't go anywhere without seeing someone I know. There I was in the middle of the remote Ontarian countryside and I run smack into the face of someone who I had practically almost accepted that I would never see again in my whole entire life because she grew up and earned her PhD and was off doing smart people things in New York. Cue the Small World song played on a tiny violin.

We ended the tour at a little pub in town, where we ate and downed a flight of four 7oz beers.

And then we started drinking for reals for reals.

Kidding.

And then we returned the bikes and took showers and ate leftover Chinese from Clifton Hill and stayed in bed for twelve hours watching FUBAR and other crazy Canadian crap on CTV.