I didn't mention to many people that Jake is away on vacation this week.

Used to be when he went away I tried to do as many non-mom things as possible.
That kind of changed earlier this year, and it is in full force about now.

Used to be when Jake went away I tried to recapture the person I was before he was born. But that started to hurt too badly because it turns out that I really miss that person, and there is no hopes in getting her back, so I stopped trying.

These days I'm just trying to figure out how to capture who I am now.

That's not so easy to do when your apron strings are being tugged every ten minutes.
That's not so easy to do when your apron strings aren't being tugged every ten minutes.

My week off was mostly spent in the house. Sometimes getting things done, sometimes not. Reading books, watching movies, not doing laundry because there isn't much to do. I saw a few friends. Got some work done at work. Things are going to change at work very soon, so I took comfort in the calm before it all happens. Things are going to change at home very soon, so I took comfort in that calm too.

Last night I tried to clean up some old posts on this blog, and ended up wiping out half my blog. Well, like a tenth of it. So much for trying to format on my BlackBerry. Oh well. I can still get to it on Reader, if I feel the need to cut and paste. I wonder if I should be backing this up a little bit better. I guess the answer is probably "probably".

This blog started out being a daily record of my life, and that got boring. I see it going back that way, and I'm not sure I want that. Sometimes I feel like the only reason I am keeping this up is because it makes me look like I'm busy back here at my little desk. Sometimes I feel like I should step away from the box and start spending time with real live people. I'm wondering how long I'll keep this blog going. Another month? Year? Decade? I feel like I'm running out of things to say.

Decisions, decisions.

That's what I was doing poking around in my archives. Digging around to see what I've said here, just to see if there is anything left in my brain. I think it's mostly out.

Maybe I'll take up watercolors or something. I'm actually pretty good at it.

Holy crap. Do you see what just happened there? I am becoming a homebody, who needs a new hobby. Watercolors? Seriously? Who is typing this post and what have you done with Lora?

Ack.