get some

Few things make me feel more like a teenage boy than brushing my cat.

I say "just relax and let it happen"
And she says "I don't know"
And I say "I'll take care of you"
And she says "That feels kind of good".

I all "lay down"
She's all "I don't know"
She's all "Let me put it in my mouth first"
I'm all "go ahead, get comfortable with it"
She's all *bite*
I'm all "hey there, not so rough"
She all *licks me a little bit to let me know she's sorry*.

I'm so "roll over on your back"
She's so "no, I don't think so"
She's so "I'm not ready for that"
She's so "well okay"
I'm so "you are a good girl"
She's so "don't touch me there"
I'm so "I'm sorry it won't happen again".

Then it happens again and she lets it happen.

I go "you're so beautiful"
She purrs
I go "I love you"
She writhes around.

Then there's a noise from somewhere downstairs and she's all *jump*
And I'm all "It's okay baby, it's probably nothing"
And she can't relax again
And I get awkward
Maybe doing it a little too hard
A little too purposeful
And she runs away
And I'm left there, all by myself, holding it in my hand.

In this case, "it" is the brush, of course.


Rinny said...

you are a mess.

Tiffany said...

LOL - You're so naughty! I like it.

Evolutionary Revolutionary said...

Is it wrong that I am sorta turned on by that exchange?

IT (aka Ivan Toblog) said...

That first line...
...it should be at the very end of the post

That would make some folks squirm

Jen Steinbauer said...

Love it!

Susan Lindgren said...

I am shaking my head. So wrong it's right.

Brenda said...

Has it been six weeks since that baby was born? Because I seriously think someone needs to have grandmom babysit the boys and she needs some alone time with her hubby. ;-)

Andrea B. said...

Ha! Too funny.

Agree that the first line would be hilarious at the end. :P But either way, you're crafty, mama!

Cara said...

OMG, you are too funny!